LOST Experience: DJ Dan 6/16 Podcast
On June 16th, the footer on djadan.am was made into a clickable link. Make note of the changes (the thrtee gree dots in the upper right, and the words “BigD” in the upper left) to the fallout footer.
By clicking on this new link, you will be redirected to Sublymonal.com.
Enter “BigD” into the login box, and DJ Dan’s latest podcast plays.
Transcript:
ANNOUNCER: *music playing* Coming to you live from the astral plain!
FEMALE VOICES: *singing* DJ DAN.
ANNOUNCER: *music playing* You’re listening to DJ DAN… *sound effect* Shutting down the man!
DJ DAN: Ok, Ok, Ok, my little ConspiraSpies, listen to this one. There’s something rotting in the state that used to be Denmark. I’m talking Iceland. I’m talking what’s become the hottest nightlife destination north of the equator. I’m talking the south beach of the North Atlantic. Hey, as far as my wife knows I’ve never been to Iceland. *Chuckles* You know what I mean? I think you do.
Now, if you know anything about Iceland, they barely have a police force. And why? These people have NO idea what crime is. I mean they let Bjork walk the streets, right Tonya? You like Bjork?
TONYA: Wait, wait, wait, …was she in her duck outfit?
DJ DAN: *Laughs* You know that aside, trust me, they’ve got their share of crimes. It’s going on right under their own noses. And no one is doing anything about it. Well I’m here to change that. I’m here to talk about the unreported crimes of Iceland’s’ very own VIK Institute. A mental hospital funded by none other than:
ANNOUNCER: *Dramatic evil music* The Hanso Foundation! *Evil laugh*
DJ DAN: Yup. The Hanso Foundation. These are the guys you see them on TV they’re building a bridge to a glowing future of peace. They’re harnessing the atom to give us nuclear genius children. You get it. They are the ultra secretive society of researchers started by this Alvar Hanso, who used to make Machines of War and apparently got hit with the case of the guilty garries and decided, “Hey! I’m gonna start anew!” You know what they say about leopards: they’ll bite you in the neck. Or is that white tigers? I don’t know.
Point being, what is going under the VIK Institute? Know one really knows. But thanks to the work of a hacker known only as Persephone, we are starting to get a picture. We’ve got a disgruntled head of the hospital, Dr. Armond Zander, who sends a letter to Dr. Thomas Werner Mittlewerk, Alvar Hanso’s pit bull, demanding to know what’s going on of his own facility. Go to the Hanso site right now, and check the hack in the Mental Health Appeal. It will blow your mind. Right off the bat, Zander calls himself a prisoner in a “hall of mirrors”, and he goes on to talk about autistic savant patients being administered secret proprietary memory tests! I mean, just what is going on!? I don’t know, but I say we shut him down! Marissa from Trenton, go ahead!
CALLER ONE (Marissa): Hey DJ Danny, what if the Hanso foundation isn’t really up to anything at all?
DJ DAN: SHUTDOWN! *Upset* Come on people! I’m reading off the darn website! Jorge (pronounced Horhey) from Portland, how is that microbrew?
CALLER TWO (Jorge): Hey it’s all gone DJ DAN. Dan, I’m on the page right now. Um, I’m wondering, what is uh sauvtistic uh, what is autistic savants again?
DJ DAN: Well uhh it varies, but a lot of times they are like uh they’re like human calculators. You uh you ever see Rain Man, Jorge?
CALLER TWO (Jorge): *On Phone* *Imitating Rain Man* Ya.
DJ DAN: You trying to be cute, Jorge?
CALLER TWO (Jorge): *On Phone* Ya *giggles* ya.
DJ DAN: SHUTDOWN! *Shutdown sound* Tonya, are you even screening these calls!?
TONYA: *Robotic* Screening the calls.
DJ DAN: Oh come on Tonya, not you too. Ok ok you’re getting back for me telling your age on the show last, last week, aren’t you?
TONYA: *Robotic* Screening the calls.
DJ DAN: I, I said you were a YOUNG thirty. *Pause* Tom from Orlando, bring me the magic.
CALLER THREE (Tom): Heeeeeeeey DJ DAN! *Cough/Laugh from Pot Head* So, I think I got it figured out!
DJ DAN: *Sarcastic* Yea, do tell.
CALLER THREE (Tom): Well, well I…I was just imagining if I’m Mittelwerk, and I’m calculating some top-secret stuff.
DJ DAN: Yea like, like what?
CALLER THREE (Tom): I don’t know…like… like Nuclear Fusion! *Tom takes a hit from a bong*
DJ DAN: *Laughs* Alright get on with it! Come on!
CALLER THREE (Tom): I’m calculating Nuclear Fusion, and I’ve got a history of getting into trouble. So, the one thing that I don’t want to do or have is a data record of what I’m doing.
DJ DAN: Ok so what you’re saying here is you, you don’t use a computer at all?
CALLER THREE (Tom): *High & laughing* EXAAACTLY! *Giggles* I do it in my head. Or, or, or in the case of the VIK Institute, I get these autistic savants to do it in THEIR head.
DJ DAN: Yea but the thing is with autistic savants, you, you can never really know what their actually capable of doing it, see? So….
CALLER THREE (Tom): So, I subject them to proprietary memory tests… *On Phone* *Background: “Yea. Memory tests”* *Background giggles*
DJ DAN: *Enthusiastic* Tom….Nice! I like it! *Tom giggling* And I’m giving your reefer stinking ass ConspiraSpy of the Month! *ConspiraSpy of the Month Sound* You hear that Tonya!
*Tom cheers in background*
TONYA: *Robotic* Conspiraspy of the Month.
DJ DAN: Ah can, can we sign up Tom as Conspiraspy of the Month?
TONYA: *Robotic* Conspiraspy of the Month.
DJ DAN: TONYA, PLEASE are you really that mad at me?
TONYA: *Robotic* Conspiraspy of the Month.
DJ DAN: Yea… yea Ok. Looks like the inmates are running asylum folks. DJ DAN. B-R-B.
MUSIC
ANNOUNCER: *music playing* You’re listening to DJ Dan… *sound effect* Shutting down the man!
Click here to return to main blog:
